Social media is designed to bring people together, aiming to replace the dopamine hit and instant gratification which we derive from face-to-face interactions. Its fundamental purpose is to foster a sense of instantaneous connection among individuals and improve the lives of its users. Unfortunately, however, it appears to be doing the exact opposite.
Recently, the Harvard Study of Adult Development concluded the longest and most extensive study on happiness ever conducted. Spanning over 85 years, the study tracked how people experienced life and what contributes to happiness. Exploring various social, emotional, and physical aspects, the report sought to answer a central question: "What do I need to do to live a good life?"
Surprisingly, the answer, as revealed by the 85-year study, isn't some groundbreaking hack or success technique promoted by your favourite influencer. It's much simpler: good relationships.
Throughout the study, it was consistently found that relationships keep people healthier and happier across their lives. They help reduce stress, improve mental health, and contribute to the ongoing development and preservation of our brains and their functions. These findings align with the notion that humans are inherently social beings, and the relationships we hold are a large determinant of our happiness.
Marc Shulz, the Associate Director of the study, emphasised in an ABC interview that individuals in their 80s, when reflecting on major life regrets, primarily lamented shortcomings in relationships rather than in their professional, financial, or personal achievements.
So, what does social media and our phones have to do with happiness and maintaining relationships? According to a Cigna report, heavy users of social media, especially in the case of Gen Z, tend to have the fewest of these "good relationships." It is interesting to note that Gen Z, despite being the highest users of social media and the most technologically connected generation in the world, also happen to be the loneliest. So much so, a staggering 73% of Gen Z report feeling alone sometimes or always.
While social media is not the sole factor contributing to loneliness or mental health issues, it plays a significant role. It is almost impossible to nurture and foster relationships with the people around us when we are so consumed by what is happening in the alternate reality of the internet.
A staggering 89% of people admit to using their phones during their last social gathering and 82% of millennials believe it's okay to read texts and emails in physical social settings. The mere presence of a mobile phone has also been found to disrupt established connections between individuals, leading to reduced feelings of empathy, trust, and closeness.
It's not just formed relationships that technology affects negatively. Studies show that when pairs of strangers are asked to have meaningful conversations, their ability to connect emotionally is significantly reduced when a mobile phone is present.
So, armed with this data and research, let's take stock of what it all means and make sense of its application in the real world. We understand that good relationships and social interactions are crucial to achieving happiness in life. Simultaneously, social media and excessive digital media use hinder our ability to establish meaningful connections. Even the mere presence of a phone can impede the ability of strangers to connect on a deeper level.
Such findings may present a good time to ask yourself some tough questions. Are your devices and technology affecting your relationships? Have any of your relationships changed since using your phone more? Are you struggling to meet new people or form new and meaningful connections?
If any of these apply or ring true to you, the first step may be putting your phone down and reinvesting in the people which matter most.
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